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6 Military Defense Strategies To Employ Against Thirsty Dudes On Tinder

I died laughing

Thought Catalog

Wikimedia Commons Wikimedia Commons

1. Shoot and Scoot

The Strategy:
Artillery tactic of firing at enemy target and then immediately exiting the area from which shots were fired to avoid being hit by a counterattack.

How to Use It:
When a Tinder match opens the dialogue by asking you to send him a pic of dem titties, politely decline his offer and then immediately delete your Tinder profile and create a new one before he can call you a chubby cuntdragon. #byefelipe

2. Vedette

The Strategy:
A mounted watchman occupying an elevated observational post who relays information or warnings of danger to a main body of troops.

How to Use It:
Have friend dance on stage at the club to survey the scene from above and warn the rest of your crew of impending migration of groping apes.

3. Breakout

The Strategy:
Military movement or advance, typically through a weak point in…

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